When They’re Grown, the Real Pain Begins

This interesting article by Susan Engel in NYT is about heartache of parents in raising children that never ends. Recently few more articles about children were posted in NYT. In one recent article David Brooks writes that more people are living single and even married couples do not want to have children because it neither provides the satisfaction as is usually claimed nor it is easily financially affordable.

In this article the author describes the heartache of parents;

“When they are little they sit on your lap; when they are big they sit on your heart”.

She writes in another paragraph when her son calls her in a crisis situation;

“Just when I thought I couldn’t take one more moment of it, Jake surprised me. He was on the phone, describing a crisis in his graduate studies. As usual, my first response was a palpitating heart and sick stomach. A plan of action began to take shape in my head. I started explaining how he should respond to the terrible graduate adviser. I wanted to ask if he was taking notes on my good advice. But I didn’t have a chance. He cut me off. “Mom,” he said, “when I tell you what’s wrong, I don’t want you to tell me how to fix it, and I don’t want you to tell me it’s not as bad as I think. I just want your sympathy.” I was stunned. Sympathy? That’s all he wanted? I could do that.”

May be when grown up children call in difficult situation, all they want is a shoulder to cry, unburden their sorrows and get soothing words of sympathy. So, Don’t give advice until they ask for it.

Read the full article by clicking on the link below: